Perhaps the greatest mistake we make, which causes a loss of self-respect, is making the opinions of others more important than our own opinion of ourselves. Self-respect means just what it says—it originates form the self. This self originated in a universal field of intention that intended you here – from the infinite formless state to a being of molecules and physical substance. If you fail to respect yourself, you’re showing contempt for the process of Creation.
You’ll find no shortage of opinions directed at you. If you allow them to undermine your self-respect, you’re seeking the respect of others over your own, and you’re abdicating yourself. Then you’re attempting to reconnect to the field of intention with low-energy attitudes of judgment, hostility, and anxiety. You’ll cycle into low-energy vibrations that will simply force you to attract more and more of these lower energies into your life. Remember, it’s high energy that nullifies and converts lower energy. Light eradicates darkness; love dissolves hate. If you’ve allowed any of those lower negative thoughts and opinions directed your way to become the basis of your self-portrait, you’re asking the universal mind to do the same. Why? Because at the high frequencies, the universal Source of intention is pure creativeness, love, kindness, beauty, and abundance. Self-respect attracts the higher energy. Lack of self-respect attracts the lower. It knows no other way.
The negative view points of others represent their low-energy ego working on you. Very simple, if you’re judging anyone, you aren’t loving them at that moment. The judgements coming your way, likewise, are unloving but have nothing to do with your self-respect. Their judgements (and yours as well) distance you from your Source, and therefore away from your power of intention. As my friend and colleague Gerald Jampolsky observed, “When I am able to resist the temptation to judge others, I can see them as teachers of forgiveness in my life, reminding me that I can only have peace of mind when I forgive rather than judge.”
This is how you return to the self in self-respect. Rather than judging those who judge you, thereby lowering your self-respect, you send them a silent blessing of forgiveness and imagine them doing the same toward you. You’re connecting to intention and guaranteeing that you’ll always respect the divinity that you are. You’ve cleared the path to be able to enjoy the great power that is yours in the field of intention.
-Wayne W. Dyer